Carolyn Reed Obituary

Carolyn Heatwole Reed, our beloved mother and grandmother, passed peacefully into the loving arms of her Lord on July 23rd, 2025 at the age of 86. Carolyn Frances Heatwole was born on April 21, 1939 on a dairy farm in Bridgewater, Virginia. She was the eighth child of Joseph and Fannie Heatwole - of an eventual thirteen. She graduated from Eastern Mennonite High School in 1956 and went on to attend Eastern Mennonite College (now EMU), where she graduated with a B.S. in Biology in 1962. In biology class, she found chemistry with a boy from Lancaster. After college graduation, Carolyn and John Ernest Reed were married at Weavers Mennonite Church on August 25, 1962. Carolyn worked as a lab technician to support John while he pursued a medical career. As his training took the couple from Richmond to Norfolk, a son arrived, John Douglas, born in 1967. As a conscientious objector to the Vietnam War, John performed his alternative service at Sacred Heart Hospital in Cumberland, MD. It was here that a daughter arrived, Catherine Leigh, born in 1969. As Carolyn turned her attention and her talents to raising her young family, John finished his medical training with a residency at the University of Maryland. While her young children were growing, Carolyn used her sewing skills frequently, and Doug and Cathy often wore handmade original clothing. John began practicing Radiology and in 1974, the family moved back to Richmond, joined First Mennonite Church of Richmond, and put down roots. Carolyn was active in her church, editing the MennoNet church newsletter. She often relished the role of church hostess - serving a delicious Sunday dinner to guests and out-of-towners. She was active in the PTA, sometimes leading letter-writing campaigns against her son's favorite violent TV shows. When Doug expressed an interest in theater, Carolyn pitched in and made costumes for his school plays. As her children grew up and left home, she looked for other ways to use her gifts. In 1988, she was the first woman elected to the board of the Williamsburg Christian Retreat Center - and she took great pride in helping shepherd that institution to its Grand Opening. Carolyn could be fiercely competitive. Anyone who ever played a game with her will remember that side. (She often attributed her competitive streak to having to share her childhood dinner table with so many siblings.) While the family lived in Richmond, she was a serious competitive tennis player, winning several amateur statewide doubles competitions in her age bracket. Carolyn loved to travel. In 1997, John had the opportunity to spend several months working at a hospital in Nazareth, and the two of them found the time deeply meaningful, as they had the opportunity to see many of the sites mentioned in the Bible. She and John also sailed the Mediterranean on a voyage designed to follow the path of the Apostle Paul. One of Carolyn's unfulfilled dreams was to take her four grandchildren to the Holy Land. They traveled often for fun. Skiing. Scuba diving. Seeing the Panama Canal with Carolyn's brothers John and Charles, and some of their families. When grandson Reed was born, a chance conversation between John and the attending OB/GYN led to John being offered a position with the prestigious Cleveland Clinic. In 1999, John and Carolyn moved to Wooster, Ohio to live in the same town as daughter Cathy and her growing family - and to be within a day's drive of son Doug and his family. At Wooster Mennonite Church, Carolyn became active in the Women's Sewing Group - knotting comforters, quilting, and following in the tradition of her mother and aunts - all of whom were accomplished at sewing. She and John loved worshipping and fellowshipping in various small groups. In Wooster, Carolyn and Cathy enjoyed their monthly mother/daughter shopping spree at Costco - even as John would always warn "You'll go broke saving money!" Carolyn and John always enjoyed being proud grandparents at school concerts and sporting events. Cathy's sons fondly remember the goodie bags of art supplies that Grandma would pack to keep them occupied during the service. After church, Sunday Lunch-Brunch became a beloved weekly tradition. Anyone who ever sat at Carolyn's table will tell you what a good cook she was, and how much joy she took in entertaining guests. Carolyn's Mennonite faith was deep and unwavering. She read the Bible from Genesis to Revelation more than 40 times during her life. We will never know the exact number, because that would be the last thing she would ever brag about. Carolyn's garden in Wooster was always immaculate. There was something blooming in her yard just about all year long, and all four grandchildren have fond memories of getting to help with the watering. John retired in 2007, un-retired after the 2008 financial crisis, and then re-retired in 2010. They looked forward to more travel, and more time with family. Then, in 2011, the spectre of dementia struck Carolyn's life for the first time. John was diagnosed with Alzheimer's. In 2011, John and Carolyn moved back to Harrisonburg, into the Virginia Mennonite Retirement Community (VMRC) - a place where they knew that John could get excellent care and a place where Carolyn had the support of her large, loving family. Carolyn threw herself into the exhausting work of 24/7 full-time caregiver, giving as much of herself as she could to John's care. She also had to suddenly take over many of the aspects of the couple's life - such as the finances and the taxes - which had traditionally been John's domain. Everything she did for him was done with love and commitment and grace. Of course, being Carolyn, she also got herself elected President of the Village resident's association. By 2017, the demands of full-time caregiving became too much for one person. John moved into memory care, and Carolyn visited every single day, advocated for his needs, took him for walks to the cafe, and was as devoted a partner as could possibly be imagined. In 2019, family and friends began to notice uncharacteristic changes in Carolyn's behavior. The spectre of dementia had struck again - this time, vascular dementia. Her memory was intact, but her ability to reason was badly damaged. Doug and Cathy were faced with the unpleasant task of taking away the car keys, taking over the finances and medical decisions, and hiring a full-time caregiving service. This was not an easy transition for anyone, particularly Carolyn. The family would like to thank First Choice Home Health Services for the excellent care they provided during these years, and to particularly remember the late Rose Sturgess - who could sass back no matter what Carolyn was dishing out - and who wound up forming a deep friendship. John passed away on January 25, 2021 after 58 years of marriage. Carolyn was by his side. In 2024, the family moved Carolyn into Warsack House, a dedicated memory care facility. She enjoyed bible study, socializing, and particularly her Sunday visits with grandson Sam - attending school just up the road. Warsack staff fondly remember her laugh, her sense of humor, and her mischievous streak. (In her last year, she was a notorious kitchen raider.) It was here, after 86 years, that Carolyn Reed finally slowed down enough for death to catch up with her. We remember her grace, her love of a full dinner table, her smile, and her easy, infectious laugh. She is free from her suffering now, and what remains with her children and grandchildren is the years of love that she poured out freely and unreservedly. Carolyn is preceded in death by her parents; her beloved husband John; her brothers, Dewitt, Dwight, Chester, Charles, and Glenn; and her sisters Ruth and Mary Ethel. She is survived by two sisters, Esther and Elizabeth; three brothers, John, Roy, and Harold; her children, Doug Reed and Cathy Yoder; a son-in-law, Brian Yoder; four grandchildren Ilsa Reed, Laszlo Reed, Reed Yoder, and Sam Yoder; and countless in-laws, cousins, nieces and nephews. A memorial service will be held at Park View Mennonite Church in Harrisonburg on Friday, August 22 at 10 a.m. with lunch to follow. In lieu of flowers, please consider a gift to Mennonite Central Committee or the Williamsburg Christian Retreat Center.